Psst…. I’m getting married.
I got engaged on November 16, 2024. Queue the water works!
Within five days of my partner asking me to spend our lives together, I’m shocked that I have…
Booked my first bridal salon appointment to try on dresses
Booked my second and third bridal salon appointments in London because we are going in January
Made a wedding email based on our wedding catch phrase: Bless this Mess. It’s a pun on our last names, Hess and Mittendorf—I’m not religious.
Made THE Google Sheet of all Google Sheets to track venue options, potential guests, said bridal appointments, photographers, florists, budget, etc.
Began filling out said lists with everything and anything I’ve saved or pinned that still feels relevant
Tried on and decided on a courthouse dress
Finished Ina Garten’s memoir (10/10 would recommend)
I’ve had a lot of jobs. Today, I’m a self-appointed member of NYC’s multi-hyphenate club. Matrix maintenance and event dominated roles over the years have led me to believe that orchestrating this once in a lifetime celebration would be second nature.
To nobody’s surprise I have quickly learned that it may not be the logistical walk in the park that the proposal was. I’m already drinking from multiple fire hoses at once trying to figure out what work needs to be created, then executed. What is our “aesthetic?” Is that thing I like too trendy? Am I going to be an “anti–bride?”
That’s how we landed here: my musings on wedding planning, in your inbox, alongside everything else you’re getting recommendations for.
How it Happened
It’s important to know my partner and I have a shared Google Calendar that I strictly live by. A few weeks ago I was surprised when “Sibling Brunch” set for Saturday, November 16 appeared.
“Why are we going to a steakhouse for brunch?” Was the only red flag. The “reservation” was for Gage and Tollner, which I only knew from a friend’s bachelor party where the attendees happily got meat sweats before crashing the hen. My partner’s little sister, Meredith who’d been visiting for a few weeks, was to blame. Classic siblings.
For sweet Meredith, I will of course go to a steakhouse at 2PM on a Saturday. For my little sister, Maddie, I would happily get dressed up for the novelty of it.
The morning of the “reservation” I had no reason to be suspicious. My partner and I enjoyed our usual coffees, I walked our sweet dog, Burger, and we marveled at our luck with the weather.
I can’t even say I was suspicious as we left for “brunch” promptly at 1:30, I was just confused, but AJ had thought of everything.
Halfway through a favorite garden of our’s, AJ dropped to one knee (a feat given their recently broken ankle) and I said yes, I would very much like to spend our lives together.
Our sisters appeared along with a very dear friend from behind trees and under bushes. Flowers were shared, photos were taken, parents were facetimed, and we walked to the bar we had our first date at three years ago.
Admittedly, I barely remember anything other than looking over every few minutes to remind AJ how much I love them, feeling glued to their side and blissfully thoughtless.
“So… we aren’t having steak for brunch?” I managed to remember as our little giddy group walked through familiar Fort Greene. “Is Rhodora even open at 2PM?”
They were open and dozens of our nearest and dearest friends had gathered to celebrate with us. Again, I was shocked and moved to tears. Our community is so important to us, and I can’t imagine the moment any other way.
It was perfect.
THEE WEDDING 🗣️🗣️